Ramblings from a 18 year old Rose...
Trust. More capable of loving. Gods love kept me. I don't just see my hurt anymore. One thing. He kept me. It was so hard. I depend on that one thing more than I did before. I am more aware of my dependence on his love apart from any other. Whether or not I have others I am still dependent on him alone. Which frees me to love others because I am not looking to them to fill me. I am not dependent on them being perfect. He alone can heal my broken relationships. I don't know what healing in this lifetime will look like. I trust his love for me so much more. It was so hard, it broke me in so many ways. It kept me up crying into the night. Crying out to God. Even that strengthened and humbled me simultaneously. Because in that hell on earth it showed me how weak I am. I am weak. But wait for it...he is strong. "Two things he told me that he is strong and he loves me, he loves me! Your love is strong." Lord please heal us. I called to him and he answered, "I am here.". I don't have to worry what they think of me. Because they are not who I serve ultimately. It's weird to say that strengthened my faith because it brought me to the end of myself. I was brought to what I thought was the end of the strength which God had given me and found out that his strength doesn't end. Or at least caught a glimpse of it. Caught a glimpse of how there is no end. Of eternity.
Comments
Post a Comment